Big News!

Y'all, he has no idea. 

That's right. We're expecting!

Can we all just collectively throw back our heads and laugh? Because life has this thing about curve balls, you know? 

Having more kids was part of the plan, but having the next one so quickly wasn't... exactly. 

Over the past three months, I've had a few good cries that were mostly hormones but also the Holy Spirit working on my heart. Turns out, something about chasing around a fifteen-month-old while you're trying not to vomit makes you break down every once in awhile. 

This woman once had very grand dreams for herself that didn't include kids, but this Momma is realizing that my dreams left by themselves are often lacking. 

And really, God has a history of speaking His dreams into existence, even His greatest one sometimes goes by the Word. So why on earth and under heaven would I hold onto my version of my life when I could take the version of the One who is able to literally breathe the impossible into being? 

I couldn't think of a good reason, either. 

So this little one grows inside of me, along with some God-written dreams.

And I'm so thankful they're both there.

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It Shall Not Disappoint

Today has shown me yet another aspect of being more free as a slave than as my own master.

Content is such a funny word. Short and sharp. Con-tent. 

Yet its fruit is deep and lasting, and gives the feeling of every missing piece shifting softly into place. I'm still stuck on the short & sharp, but see my misplaced pieces shifting slowly. 

Learning to be content comes from being liberatingly bonded to One greater than I. 

My heart had dreams, and as my own master I kept my dreams right where they started. Knowing that hope deferred does indeed make the heart sick. I was simultaneously scared that my dreams would never leave, and that they would, yet come back broken & bleeding, leaving scars of cynicism and bitterness. 

When trading prison-freedom for freedom from prison, my dreams were no longer the biggest thing residing in my heart. They were pushed aside, the ugly bits of self-glory being squeezed out, and replaced with Hope Eternal.

Hope which does not disappoint. Hope that I can allow to leave my heart and trust implicitly to change me and others. 

Hope that takes the pushed aside dreams and replaces the self-glory with His glory and all of a sudden my dreams are leaving my heart and taking on flesh & bone; and looking more and more like my Savior than myself, and oh, how could something so beautiful come from my heart? 

Only because it is no longer my own. 

Now, as a slave to Christ, I can be content in dreaming and then living. I can watch the missing pieces of my dreams shift softly into place. Even in a broken world where still dreams are not guaranteed success, because my hope is not hinged on success, but salvation. 

What are your dreams?