Y'all, I Love My Friends

I spent a lot of this weekend writing out thank you's to the many people who have been blessing Kyle and I with gifts for our little girl. Most of them were women, because, well, that's who came to my baby showers. 

Anyway, it got me thinking how amazing and beautiful these women are; and how it'd be crazy if I was friends with one of them, but how really it's the grace of God that I count myself friends with all of them. 

Maybe this is a Southern thing, or a Christian bubble thing, or a Southern Christian bubble thing, but it seems people are often nervous to talk about facets of their lives that are actually pretty freaking sweet, because they don't want to make other people feel bad who may not be in the same place. 

Which is a good and sensitive thing, but I wonder if it also keeps us from really reveling in specific areas that God has blessed us in. It all comes down to approach, I'm sure. 

Like me being clear that I haven't done anything, really, at all, to deserve a community of women like the one I have - especially if you knew more about my backstory; and that I know many women who do deserve one, but don't have one, and I don't really understand why. So the biggest reason I felt compelled to write anything down was because this huge wave of absolute gratefulness hit me - that God's given me this circle of women for this season. 

A circle of women that I feel safe enough with to cry in front of (like, rage-cry), or make inappropriate jokes with, or be angry about something that I probably shouldn't be but am anyway, and I know they won't jump on my bandwagon but they won't make me feel like a jerk either. 

That I can talk about the hard parts of my marriage with, and I know they know my husband and they know I love him even if there are days you wonder, you know, how "forever" is going to happen. And they listen and nod and encourage and send me back to Kyle with a heart full of hope and not resentment. 

That I can vent about how hard motherhood is, and (again) they listen and nod and encourage and know that I love Z even if there are days you wonder, you know, how raising a healthy human being to adulthood is going to happen. And they send me back into the trenches of raising little ones with joy and not bitterness or boredom. 

A circle of women that are at different stages in life, and have walked different paths in life, and each have their own Jesus-story. Being able to watch each of them love Him, and maybe even more so watching Him love each of them, has taught me more about how wide and how long and how high and how deep the love of Christ is than any amount of sermons or books could. 

It hasn't always been scented candles and soft laughter over coffee mugs, mind you. There's been sharp points meeting vulnerable spots and apologies needed and misunderstandings cleared. But these women, they're willing to work hard at friendship and community and connections that are deeper then a quick smile and nod as we pass each other on Sunday morning. 

Because what motivates them is much deeper then a mere sense of sisterhood. 

It's Christ. Christ, who exists in a constant state of community, and therefore as His followers the need for deep connection echoes through our souls. 

These women, I've seen them do it many times, roll up their sleeves and head into the scary world of female friendships, ready to fight for each other. I've had the privilege of watching them on the front lines for several years, and let me assure you that no battlefield can wound like the one of friendship with women. The risk is great, yet they continue. 

And so, I am thankful for these women who have walked before me in marriage, motherhood, ministry, and life, the women I can look at and ask, "How did you make it through?"; and the women who are walking behind me, who I can look at and say, "Come! Be brave, follow Christ, and let us help you as sisters." 

And I soak in each day I have to walk alongside them. 

A Friday Ramble & Share

Ramble:

There really is something about believers gathered. No matter how out of tune the voices that are being raised in worship, or how hesitant prayers fall off the lips of the faithful, it does fill the soul to think that the sacred mixes with our humanity and we can see it before our very eyes.

Maybe it's no coincidence we are called His Body? A mix of the sacred and human that echoes the actual Man who walked this earth.

Last night we discussed the importance of meeting together. Many beautiful reasons to match our different hearts and minds. I, for one, need the nourishment of it all. I need the sweet laughter and the salty tears.

I need the challenge. It is too easy for me to walk in the aspects of my faith that come naturally and let the other bits fall to the wayside. I need someone to serve others endlessly and want me to come alongside them and do the same. I need another to speak Scripture as easily as they breathe and want me to join the conversation. I need someone to love deeply and pull me in with them.

And, selfishly enough, when I hermit myself right into a place of isolation, my writing dries up quicker than a Texas summer, both in quantity and quality.

A faint thought inside me wonders if it's not the same for everyone's giftings, though. They dry up when we can't use them on others.

These are my ramblings for this Friday.

Share:

To end, here's some blog posts/videos that I stumbled across this week and loved:

1. I don't know who this girl is, but do I EVER wish I had heard when I was younger (or, what's more likely, actually listened to someone who tried to tell me) why you don't want to miss Jesus while you're waiting for that "special someone".

2. If you are the mother of a toddler (which I'm not, yet...), or just someone who appreciates humor (which I am, always....), you need to read this blog. This is one of my favorite posts.

3. Best video about nursing in public, ever. (Fair warning, it does have a woman breastfeeding, don't want to unnecessarily surprise people!)

4. If you've ever had to do "cold-call follow up" for a church (aka: had to call up a complete stranger because they left their contact information on an info card), you will appreciate this video.

Philippians 1

Over Christmas break my lifegroup and I thought it would be good to read a book of the Bible and discuss it via a facebook thread. (I felt really cool starting a thread....) 


So we chose Philippians. It's one of my favorite books in the Bible and also happens to be only four chapters long. 


I began reading in The Message and really loved the translation, so I thought I'd share what came of it. So here's the inordinately long facebook message that the girls in my lifegroup received: 


One of my favorite passages in the book of Philippians is right in the beginning. (vs. 1-11) I remember reading these in college, and realizing that how Paul talks about the church in Philippi is what I desire for the community I'm a part of - particularly verses 3-6, & 9-11. 

The first thing I desire is the sincere love Paul has for the church at Phillipi. He even goes so far in verses 7 & 8 to explain that it's not "fanciful" for him to have such strong affection for this group of people. The Philippian church partnered with him in the Gospel. They were on the front lines with Paul. 

"It's not at all fanciful for me to think this way about you. My prayers and hopes have deep roots in reality. You have, after all, stuck with me all the way from the time I was thrown in jail, put on trial, and came out of it in one piece. All along you have experienced with me the most generous help from God. He knows how much I love and miss you these days. Sometimes I think I feel as strongly about you as Christ does!" (vs. 7-8, The Message)

This always challenges me to not settle in regard to my community. I feel like it's very easy for me to slip into making it merely a fun place to be, or, better yet, a place where people come and open up a little bit and even do, in fact, experience God. 


When they graduate and move on, however, their walk with God hasn't deepened, their faith hasn't been challenged, and they haven't grabbed hold of Christ with a fierce grip reinforced by an even fiercer heart knowledge of grace. 

I want my church home to be a place of safety where I feel I can be myself, for sure; but I can't deny how much deeper my connections are with people who I have gone to battle with, the ones who I have served side by side with to advance the kingdom. 

I think of the Trinity, Father, Son, & Holy Spirit, they are Three-in-One. I wonder how much of that connection stems from the fact that their one pursuit is the redemption of mankind for Glory. The Father in His immense power & holiness, The Son in His heart-pounding, passionate love, & the Spirit in His deep comfort and piercing conviction all working together, simultaneously to bring man back to God. Such unity is something no human has ever known. 

We do get a taste of it though, I think. That's why Paul's language is so strong. If you continue reading, later on in the chapter Paul wrestles with which would be better: to stay on earth and serve the believers, or to die and finally be united with Christ? To stay and continue to serve, struggle, sweat, & bleed with other members of the Body? Or to finally go home, and be with Him who the deep places in our hearts long for? "To live is Christ, and to die is gain." 

How beautiful of a struggle to have, though. Sometimes I am overcome with the desire to show this to unbelievers. I lack the ability, but the Holy Spirit doesn't. This is what I desire for my church. For us to be a vessel for the Holy Spirit to show unbelievers the joy of such unity. The joy of being unified with Christ and unified with other members of His Body. 

After feeling so strongly this desire for my community to be (by the grace of God) a powerful tool for the advancement of the Kingdom, Paul's prayer in verses 9-11 makes more sense to me. I think the only way we can be effective is by having the kind of love Paul describes here: 

"So this is my prayer: that your love will flourish and that you will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. You need to use your head and test your feelings so that your love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush. Live a lover's life, circumspect and exemplary, a life Jesus will be proud of: bountiful in fruits from the soul, making Jesus Christ attractive to all, getting everyone involved in the glory and praise of God." (The Message)